"Are you sulking?" Nasim always asked the same question, and Kal always answered it the exact same way. He'd scoff and tell him he never sulked, but the honest truth was that he was a little hurt. Kal, who had never once in his life had a successful relationship last longer than two months, had finally experienced a little bit of heartbreak. Carrie wasn't just someone he loved, she was the person he though he was meant to love. They had hated each other so much and their sheer disdain for the other made their passion for one another that much stronger. It had brought them closer, and she was the kind of girl that kept him on his toes and constantly knocked him down a few pegs. And now, for the second time in just as many months, she was gone and he was alone.

This time there was no goodbye. This time there was no promise to come home, or explanation for leaving. She just wasn't there anymore.

It had taken him a while to realize it, in all fairness. Kal wasn't bright, and therefore at first he didn't think much of it. She could have been anywhere and he didn't once consider that she wouldn't come home to him. But after a week of nothing, he realized she wasn't afterall. "Are you sulking?" Nasim would ask, and by this time Kal would just shrug. "Nah," he'd reply but the truth was, he was doing a lot more than sulking. He was hurting.

On the other hand, he would have been lying if he said he wasn't at least enjoying himself with the distractions he had. With a friend back in town, he was getting out and keeping himself distracted, even if he occasionally looked at her and let the what if's cross his mind. He wasn't stupid, though. She was so far out of Kal's league that it was nothing but a childish dream to think she'd ever see him as anything other than just a boy that happenend to be a friend, who also happened to be great at Super Smash Bros. Beyond their time together, and his time spent with Nasim or holed up in his studio, he needed something more. He needed other stimulations in his life, and despite his best efforts to shrug the idea making a Tinder profile off, in the end he found himself signing up and sighing in relief over the instant gratification.

The first few times, it was effortless. He'd meet a girl, they would get just drunk enough to forget why they needed this, but sober enough to make sure it was worth their time. Then it got a little messier and more complicated. Once or twice he got too inebriated. He'd pass out before he could accomplish anything which would result in him getting slapped or having a door slammed in his face. It ignited something within him, a plethora of emotion that ranged from guilt to rage to burning carnal desire. She was gone and Kale did his best to fill the empty spot she left behind by trying to fill the empty spot in his bed, the mattress bowed ever so slightly where she used to sleep. No one would feel the same next to him, but he supposed in time, it'd pick a new form to mold to and life would go on.

(home)